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Just What Is Personal Leadership?
- One Leaders Perspective
By Greg Thomas
You
have probably read or heard the following scenario a hundred times! An actor, athlete,
politician or religious figure appears to have it all. They struggle for many
years to develop the skills needed to get to the top. They have a burning
desire to be the best. They appear to “pay their dues” and make a total
commitment to reach the pinnacle of their craft. Then, when it seems they have
climbed to the top of the mountain and finally achieved their lifetime goal of
celebrity, wealth, power, or prestige…it happens. A fatal flaw rapidly appears
to bring them down like a house of cards. For some it may be a life altering
addiction, or a blatant lack of integrity. For others it may be outright
hypocrisy or a self-absorbed ego that has led them to believe they are now above
the standards and justice that everyone else is expected to live by. Whatever
the reasons or excuses given, they all have one important thing in common. In
spite of their talents and abilities they lacked an essential trait needed to
preserve success. This trait is personal leadership. It is a term you
will often find in the various articles of this magazine.
Personal leadership is the
desire of an individual to take charge of his or her own life. Personal leaders
realize that leadership is not a position or title, but an outlook on life and
their role in the world. The best way I can describe personal leadership is to
discuss some of its desired traits. Like most things worth having, these
do not come easily to a person. If they did, the individuals discussed in the
opening paragraph would have had it. On the other hand, living a philosophy of
personal leadership does not require a magical formula. Nor is it available to
only a few. It is actually available to most but what it requires is a
commitment to balance, a sense of purpose and values. If personal leadership
had a motto it would be this, “Before I seek to change or motivate others I
must first learn to change and motivate myself. I must first become the change
I wish to see in others.” In this way personal leadership is also about
becoming a good follower as we seek continuous improvement and correct our
course when convicted. Let’s discuss a few traits or qualities of personal
leadership. Some of these qualities I have already discussed in past issues of weLEAD Online
Magazine. You can find a listing of these articles here.
Personal leaders have a game
plan for their life. Call it what you will…personal mission statement, life
strategic plan, setting of goals or a personal punch list…it is all about
giving your life direction or establishing a clear path for your
life. Unfortunately most people live their lives like a raft floating in the
ocean. They bob up and down, left and right, over and under, depending on the
tempest of the sea. They become victims of circumstances and allow time to make
decisions they are unwilling to make for themselves. Personal leaders are
absolutely convinced they have a great degree of control over their own
outcomes and circumstances. They are not about to leave their future in the hands
of “time and chance”. The sea change they look forward to is the one
that occurs when they have learned something new and decide to now make
it a part of their life. Just like an athlete or their team needs a game plan
to excel, so does a personal leader. A mental break-through comes when
we take the vague ideas and goals rolling around in our head and put them on
paper as a personal mission statement! When done correctly and reviewed
often it has the potential to magnify our focus and increase our desire for
achievement at a higher level. In discussing goals Gary Wills reminds us that
leadership and followership are void without a third element. He writes, “But
the discussion cannot get far without a third thing – the goal.” The goal is
the cement that holds the leader/follower relationship together and this includes
the way we relate to our own hearts and minds. Remember, as personal leaders we
are internally both followers and leaders at the same time!
Most personal leaders realize
and accept the fact that there is a spiritual element to life.
They may not totally understand it or always sense it but they know it is
there. I know the discussion of spirituality is not considered vogue or
“politically correct” in some circles. That is too bad and their personal
loss. Respected author Peter Block reminds us that, “Spirituality is the
process of living out a set of deeply held personal values, of honoring forces
or a presence greater than ourselves. It expresses our desire to find meaning
in, and to treat as an offering what we do”. This spiritual element provides a
number of positive characteristics that cannot be found or nurtured anywhere
else. The personal leader knows the purpose of their existence must go far
beyond the pursuit of the “whoever dies with the most toys wins” philosophy of
our modern society. They know that every day of life is a precious gift
and an endowment to become something even better. This spiritual element also
provides them a mental toughness to endure the difficult periods of their
life. They come to realize that sad or tragic things also happen for a purpose
even if we do not yet understand exactly what that purpose is.
Another characteristic of the
spiritual element for a personal leader is accepting risk and responsibility. Personal
leadership is not about comfort zones or the status quo, it is about the
passion for continual growth and improvement. Every positive and healthy
change that has ever occurred in human civilization has only come about by
great struggle and by rejecting the way things are as “good enough”. Personal
leaders accept the challenge to make things better…to inspire others to become
better…to win! In contrast, most folks will accept only a very limited
degree of risk or accountability. Therefore they don’t seek to become winners,
they just try not to lose! John Gardner reminds us that, “Most people in
most organizations most of the time are more stale than they know, more bored
than they care to admit. All too often it is because they have not been
encouraged to use their own initiative and powers of decision. And if they are
not expected to use their decision-making powers, they are off the hook of
responsibility”. Personal leadership is the opposite of this common workplace
dilemma. It is all about initiative, decision-making and responsibility.
For the personal leader
this spiritual element affects how they view themselves and others. Since they
know they are accountable for their attitudes and actions they do a regular
self-analysis. It is interesting to note that most major religious faiths in
the world designate a period of time or a season for the followers to perform a
candid self-analysis. Personal leaders know and acknowledge their strengths and
weaknesses. They work hard to build on these strengths and use them to propel
their life in a positive direction. They also work to correct or at
least modify their weaknesses. Yes, a personal leader is willing to do a
critical self-appraisal and ask themselves where they need to do
better…where they must do better. Steven Covey has written the following
powerful statement. “The place to begin building any relationship is inside
ourselves, inside our circle of influence, our own character.” This inner
relationship, like all healthy relationships…must be built around honesty and
not self-denial.
However, here is an important
key. This meditative analysis should be honest and candid. It should provoke
disappointment in our failings and a resolve to become more than we presently
are. However, it should not be a negative routine of “beating” or tearing
ourselves down. Why? A negative self-analysis decreases our
motivation, and it doesn’t offer ANY solutions. It is for this reason that
major religious faiths of the world also have a theological concept called
“forgiveness”. This means that it is indeed important to analyze our faults and
acknowledge them. It is productive to accept responsibility for them and
determine to change. However, once this is done it is also important to let it
go and get on with life. We can’t change what we did or said yesterday. We can
apologize and resolve to be better but we can’t change yesterday. There is no
benefit to “mentally reliving” or beating ourselves over and over again for
something that is in the past. We can’t do anything about what has already
happened but we can have a positive effect on what happens today and tomorrow!
This is why personal leaders learn to focus on the present and not on
the past.
Personal leaders have strong
values and these principles become their moral and ethical
compass. Values like integrity, honesty, kindness, open-communication and
treating others with dignity is the hallmark of the 21st century
leader. This is a dramatic change from what was accepted in the past,
especially in democratic cultures where people now have a choice of who and
what to follow. Followers will now abandon the self-absorbed or hypocritical
leader. They no longer need to put up with a phony and when they
discover that a leaders’ real interest is manipulative or selfish they will
leave. Followers and supporters now have just a few words for this kind of
leader…goodbye and good-riddance! Treating others with fairness and respect is
an underlying value behind the personal leadership philosophy. For most
people, competition toward others is the “name of the game”. Even within the same
organizations individuals spend most of their time competing with each other
for power, rank or privilege. Everyone is trying to claw their way to the top
without regard to the real cost to others or the organization. Personal
leadership is about self-competition. The real question is not did I
win, but how did I do today. It doesn’t make sense to compare yourself
to others because you can only control your own performance.
Self-competition means we try to do better today than we did yesterday because
we constantly try to perform at a personal best. From this perspective,
“winning or losing” against others becomes a secondary consideration and
even irrelevant.
The
last trait I will discuss for a personal leader is that of leaving a legacy.
Most people with a strong ambition and degree of success attempt to build
monuments to themselves or establish large companies that bear their name. This
is a shallow and fleeting hope for immortality. Eventually monuments crumble
and it is no great honor to have your family name associated with peanut butter
or toilet tissue! The personal leader believes they were given both life
and opportunity as a gift and for a definite purpose. Yes, they also want to
leave a positive legacy, but not in buildings or in the prominence of their
name. Instead they know that a lasting legacy with real value…is in
people. It begins with their families and loved ones. They seek to inspire and
motivate their loved ones to reach their own potential and fulfill their very
own dreams. But it doesn’t stop there! The personal leader deeply wants to give
something back to the world as a thank you for the gift of life on a
crowded planet. This kind of leader wants to impart what they have learned to others
to help make their lives more productive and fulfilling! It may be in
serving the community, mentoring others, visiting the lonely, teaching a class,
or any number of ways to leave a personal endowment of service to the
world. Every personal leader will have their own niche or way of serving, but
it is from this that we will often find the greatest satisfaction.
In conclusion, these are some
of the common traits that define what personal leadership is. No one I have
ever met has all of these traits or has them completely. I know I certainly
don’t have them all or to the degree I desire. No one is perfect and that
includes those who seek to be leaders. These traits are the ideals we
should all strive for each and every day. Taken together they help create a
balance that promotes our stability and “keeps our feet on the ground”.
Personal leaders are not superior to other people. They have simply chosen to
make a difference in the world beginning in a small way…and to start this
process within themselves. They have consciously decided to first become the
change they wish to see in others and in this world. They are committed to the
belief that personal leadership is about becoming a good follower, seeking
continuous improvement, and correcting our own flaws when convicted. As we have
seen by the example of countless actors, athletes, politicians or religious
figures…the lack of personal leadership brings an inevitable decline and
fall.
But, when your personal life
is in balance, because you have chosen to control its direction and
accept responsibility, virtually anything is possible.
Greg’s book on Personal
Leadership
Making
Life’s Puzzle Pieces Fit (Using the 12 Principles of Personal Leadership)
Comments
to: gthomas@leadingtoday.org
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About the author:
Greg is
the founder and President of weLEAD Incorporated. Chartered in 2001, weLEAD
Inc. is a 510(3)(c) non-profit organization and a major respected resource for
free leadership development information reaching a worldwide audience. He has an extensive thirty-five years
experience in public speaking and has spoken to hundreds of audiences. Greg has
provided leadership seminars and keynote speeches for organizations as diverse
as Ramapo College, FirstMerit Bank, American Society for Quality, Shelby County
Tennessee - District Attorney General’s Office, Academy of Certified Hazardous
Materials Managers and the Pennsylvania Governor’s Institute. He has also
conducted public seminars sponsored by weLEAD Incorporated.
References:
Block,
P. (1996). Stewardship – Choosing
Service over Self-interest. San Francisco: Beret-Koehler Publishers
Covey,
S. (1992). Principle-Centered Leadership. New York: Fireside (Simon
& Schuster)
Gardner,
J. (1990). On Leadership. New York: The Free Press.
Wills,
G. (1994). Certain Trumpets – The Call of Leaders. New York: Simon &
Schuster