weLEAD
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2003 ã weLEAD, Inc.
When I was a child my uncle had a
favorite saying. When things would go wrong he would mutter, “My mother said
there would be days like this”. Then he would immediately opine…”but she never
said there would be so many of them
and they would all follow one
another!” Do you consider yourself a failure? Do you look at your past or
present achievements with a sense of disappointment? Have you attempted to be a
servant-leader only to feel your efforts have been in vain?
Perhaps
you have had goals or dreams that have not been fulfilled. Maybe you have lost
your zeal and enthusiasm about the future. Everyone goes through the valleys
and shadows of life. Many of the greatest leaders who ever lived experienced a
period of “exile” or despondency in their lifetime! Some days and seasons of
life are very good, and some days are far from good. It is certainly true that
when we feel we have “missed the mark” or failed, we should seriously examine
what we did wrong to learn from the experience. It is also true that “what we
sow we shall reap”. But before you
consider yourself or others a failure, I would like to give you a few things to
think about.
Failure
is a strong word. It even sounds
harsh and judgmental. In the western world it is often applied to people in a
condescending way. It is also typically used in a way that emphasizes
permanence. When someone is designated a failure it is often implied they have
little value and the opportunity to change their situation is minimal. When an
event is called a failure it is often implied that the results were miserable
and unchangeable. But is this really the correct definition of this coarse
word? Is this the proper perspective
for a leader to have?
First
of all, a failure is relative to time. How do we know we have had a good
day? The answer is often relative to the passing of time. Sometimes we may believe
we have had an excellent day only to find out later that something else was
going on we didn’t know was occurring. When we analyze the day in its entirety
it turns out to be different than we first thought. On the other hand, we have
all had days that seemed to be bad. Maybe everything appeared to go wrong or we
may have had a big single event that turned the entire day into a negative
frame. Yet, as we look back at the events of that day it may have turned out to
be the best thing that ever happened to us! Time turns a lot of failures into
successes. The first great American general was George Washington. But early in
the American Revolutionary War few would have called him adequate, let alone
great! He lost virtually every battle and skirmish against the British troops.
He and his men were demoralized and at times it appeared the war was lost. Yet
time proved these battles had just the right
effect. The British resolve to keep the American colonies was being
diminished with each battle and with the loss of each British solder. It turned
out that winning battles was not as important as the resolve to continue … no
matter what the odds.
Time
transcended George Washington from a failure to a hero. The same can be true in
our lives!
We must often be prepared to
patiently wait for our efforts to produce results we can see. It is easy to do something and expect immediate results.
We many even suspect failure has occurred if we don’t quickly see something
tangible happen. But remember that seeds grow underground before you can see them. Sometimes they grow slowly and first
establish roots before we see any tangible evidence of life. Those of us who
garden learn to wait for the flowers to bloom. In the same way we must be
careful not to casually judge an action or event as a failure. It is very
possible that not enough time has elapsed to correctly judge the results. That
principle holds true in nature and in life.
The
second thing about failure is that it is relative to your perspective. Something terrible may happen in your life, but upon
close examination you may clearly see a “silver lining”. There is an old
Norwegian story about a fisherman who was out to sea with his two sons. The day
was very good and they had achieved a
large catch that would make anyone proud. But then a storm suddenly appeared
that was so fierce and dark they could no longer see the shoreline! The boat
rocked and creaked violently and the three men thought they would lose their
lives. As if that wasn’t bad enough, they lost their sense of direction and
feared they would be lost at sea. Unknown to the fisherman, a tragic fire
started at his home about the same time. It began in the kitchen of his cottage
and destroyed every possession he had! The fisherman and his sons eventually found
their bearings and were able to bring their boat safely ashore. When the men
reached the dock, the fisherman’s wife was waiting to meet him with the tragic
news of the fire. She uttered while crying, “Karl, a fire has destroyed
everything we had”. “We have nothing left!” But the fisherman appeared to be
unmoved by her news. She continued, “Karl, are you listening to me…everything
is gone!” Karl nodded his head and replied, “Yes dear…I heard you…but a couple
of hours ago, the boys and I thought we would die at sea. We were in despair
and losing hope we would ever find the shore. Then I saw a dim yellow glow in
the distance. We rowed toward it closer and closer and it grew ever larger
drawing us toward its light. The same fire that destroyed our home saved our
lives!”
Karl
understood an important lesson. Failure is often success when we see it from a different point of view. If we have a
positive mindset it is virtually impossible to reflect on any event which
doesn’t have some good in it, if only
we are willing to look for it. In 1872 a severe drought occurred in California
that shriveled up a farmer’s entire grape crop. All other farmers considered
their crops a failure. However, one farmer sent his “dried up” grapes to a
grocery store and they were advertised as Puruvian delicacies. These decimated
grapes even began to sell for a premium price far above the cost of fresh
grapes! And from this crop failure, we have all been eating raisins since that time! Again, failure
is largely determined by our perspective and point of view. If you consider
yourself or an event as a failure perhaps another
look is in order!
The perception of life at any given
moment may not reveal its true
meaning. Most of us make the mistake of judging events by too short of a segment
of time, or too few events! If we judge everything by too few circumstances, we
will incorrectly read the whole of
life by a few isolated events. Perhaps another day away or over the next hill
we will be able to view what appeared to be a failure as a true success. The
people who win are those who hold on to their hopes and dreams and patiently
wait for the proper perspective to become clear.
Many
folks feel like failures because they need the right standards to measure success or failure. Success is
not the achievement of power, prestige or great influence. Many individuals
achieve these things but are not happy or even content with what they have.
Many athletes and entertainers achieve these things only to lose it all in an
orgy of self-destruction. Success is doing what you can, with where you are,
and what you have to work with!
Achieving
our best is always limited by our
circumstances. It is easy to say, “if only I have known or if only I could turn
back the hands of time”. But we simply can’t do that, because no one can know
everything. We all have to make decisions and plot our direction only with the information we presently
have at hand.
In conclusion, as a leader be careful how you define a
“failure” and how quickly you make this judgment. Yes, when we feel we have “missed
the mark” or failed, we should
seriously examine what we did wrong to learn from the experience! But, remember that failure is relative to time. What may appear to be
a failure today may have planted the seeds for success later on. Secondly, failure is often success when we
see it from a different point of
view. With a proper perspective…what we actually
experience or the “end result” may be far different than what we immediately see.
Many years ago a young struggling
cartoonist lost his job when he was told by his boss “he couldn’t draw and had
no talent”. He decided to work for himself and find his own clients. After a
long period of struggle and failure he found only one customer! A minister paid
him a very small amount of money to draw advertising for his church. The
cartoonist was so downtrodden and pathetic
the church allowed him to stay in their mouse-infested garage. While he lived
there he drew cartoons that no one wanted, and nicknamed his favorite little mouse who scurried in
the garage…Mickey. From apparent failure Walt Disney transcended disappointment
and misfortune to become a success. He achieved this by believing in his
vision, and his mission along with time
and a right perspective.
So can you!
Comments to: editor@leadingtoday.org
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About the author:
Greg
has over 25 years of sales and marketing experience within the electrical
manufacturing industry. Some of his positions have included being a National
Sales Manager, National Marketing Manager and Regional Sales Manager. He also has an extensive 35 years experience
in public speaking and has written articles for various publications. Greg has
a Master of Arts degree in Leadership from Bellevue University, where he has
served as an adjunct professor. He is the founder of weLEAD Incorporated, a
nonprofit organization chartered to promote personal and organizational
leadership. Greg's personal site is located at http://www.greglthomas.info